I see it coming from a mile away but still, it gets me everytime. I say I don’t have any expectations but deep down, I do and then… I get disappointed. In this scenario, it was a blind date. It was pretty fun and he’s a nice guy. I don’t know if I like him yet or not. It wasn’t fireworks exploding off the Eiffel Tower but it wasn’t bad at all either. I say I didn’t expect it to be life changing, but I did underneath, apparently.
This guy is great, interesting, functional, and cute. After one date, I don’t know yet what his “spark” is. You know that thing that makes you special, that keeps you going and lights you up inside. That’s the number one thing I want to see in a partner. It’s usually what gets me in trouble actually, because I usually only see that and not the rest of the picture. I’m not a person that can be with someone who drinks a lot, and goes to work. I get that is the way some people live, and that’s fine, it’s just not for me.
I only met this guy briefly and he may have an incredible spark. I am just very clear that I need substance, depth, richness, and interest in engaging in the world. So… When I don’t see that at first, I get disappointed and don’t understand why the world doesn’t see things the way I do.
It’s never going to be perfect, I get that. But it still surprises me everytime. I read that it’s the Pisces dreamer in me, maybe or maybe it’s just one gal looking for her Mr. Right. Either way, I’m still a work in process on letting my expectations get the best of me.
If this guy turns out to be Mr. Right, I’m all for that. If he turns out to be a friend, that’s good too. What I won’t do again is settle for someone who isn’t right for me and try to make it work. So expections, I see you, simmer down please so I can be get to know new people and see where that goes.
Here’s to love. May it bless you and teach you. And here’s to learning, more about ourselves, each other, and the world, so that our spark will join the millions of others in lighting up the world.